"My suffering brings me closer to God—it's making me holier."
How it sounds in your head: The pain has forced me to pray more, to depend on Him. Maybe this is what it takes to really know God—to be stripped of everything, to suffer like Jesus did. Maybe I'm finally becoming the woman He wanted me to be.
"For by one offering He has perfected forever those who are being sanctified."
-- Hebrews 10:14Religion glorified suffering as spiritual maturity, confusing pain with intimacy and making holiness about endurance.
She's experienced genuine closeness to God during suffering, and church teaching said 'fellowship of His sufferings' means sharing His pain. Proximity to death makes spiritual things feel more urgent and real.
Disciples asked if the man's blindness was caused by his sin or his parents' sin—looking for a spiritual lesson. Jesus said NEITHER—'but that the works of God should be revealed in him'—then He immediately HEALED him. No lesson, just power.
I REFUSE the lie that suffering makes me holier. IT IS WRITTEN that by ONE offering Jesus perfected me FOREVER—I'm not becoming righteous through pain. Jesus suffered so I wouldn't have to—He took the chastisement for my peace, the stripes for my healing. God's nearness isn't dependent on my suffering; His presence is a GIFT, not a reward for endurance. IT IS WRITTEN that Jesus came to give me ABUNDANT life, not abundant suffering. I am the righteousness of God IN CHRIST—a gift, not an achievement earned through pain. The BARAK blessing means I am blessed in my body, not broken for holiness.
Your Father isn't keeping you sick to get you holy—He made you holy by the blood, in one moment, finished. He's not watching your suffering with approval; He's running toward you with healing, the same way Jesus ran toward every broken body He ever saw.