"This disability is teaching me to rely on God instead of my own strength."
How it sounds in your head: I used to be the strong one, the capable one, the guy who had it together physically. Maybe God needed to break that self-reliance, to strip away my physical pride so I'd finally lean on Him instead of my own abilities.
"He gives power to the weak, and to those who have no might He increases strength."
-- Isaiah 40:29Source: Religion - confusing the stripping of self-reliance (good) with the stripping of physical ability (not God's method).
You DID rely too much on your own strength before, and now you CAN'T, forcing you to pray more and depend on others. The spiritual fruit makes the physical loss seem intentional and necessary from God.
Crippled in both feet from age five, hiding in fear of being killed as Saul's grandson. David RESTORED him to the king's table permanently, gave him all of Saul's land, and treated him as a son - showing God's heart is RESTORATION of the disabled to full honor, not using disability as a teaching tool.
I REFUSE the lie that God disabled me to teach me dependence. IT IS WRITTEN that He gives power to the weak and INCREASES strength to those with no might - His response to weakness is STRENGTH, not permanent loss. God didn't break my body to fix my pride; Jesus broke pride at the cross. I rely on Him WITH strength, not BECAUSE of disability. IT IS WRITTEN that by His stripes I was healed - He took the punishment so I could walk in wholeness. I am under the BARAK blessing where my body is blessed, my strength is blessed, and my physical abilities are restored by covenant promise.
The Father doesn't cripple His sons to make them dependent - He strengthens them in their weakness and runs toward them with restoration like David ran to Mephibosheth. Your physical wholeness AND spiritual dependence are both His gifts, not either/or.