"I've sinned too much for too long—God must be disgusted with me by now."
How it sounds in your head: There's a point where sin crosses from 'struggling' to 'disgusting,' and you crossed it. Decades of the same patterns. God isn't just disappointed—He's DISGUSTED. You're repulsive to Him.
"Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma."
-- Ephesians 5:1-2Source: Religion's 'God loves you but hates your sin' lie, creating the belief that repeated sin makes you disgusting to God.
When you're disgusted with yourself, it's easy to project that onto God. At sixty-three, patterns that haven't changed feel permanently repulsive.
This woman was caught IN THE ACT—publicly humiliated, dragged before Jesus, guilty without question. Religion wanted her stoned. Jesus said 'Neither do I condemn you'—INSTANT forgiveness, no process, no probation—and sent her away FREE.
I REFUSE the lie that God is disgusted with me. IT IS WRITTEN: Christ gave Himself for me as a SWEET-SMELLING AROMA to God—not disgusting, but DELIGHTFUL. I don't approach in my sin; I approach IN CHRIST. IT IS WRITTEN: There is NO condemnation for those in Christ Jesus. I am Abraham's seed—Abraham LIED to kings and stayed blessed. The BARAK protects liars, deceivers, and worse—how much MORE me, covered in JESUS' blood?
Your Father isn't disgusted—He's delighted. Like the prodigal's father who embraced his son while he STILL SMELLED LIKE PIGS, your Father runs toward you, not away. You smell like JESUS to Him.