"You need to detach completely and let them hit rock bottom before God will move."
How it sounds in your head: The Christian counselor said 'radical boundaries' and the book said 'tough love means walking away.' Maybe you're enabling by still answering her calls from rehab. Everyone says God won't intervene until she loses everything, so maybe your love is actually blocking His work.
"But when he was still a great way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him."
-- Luke 15:20Source: Pop psychology baptized as Christian wisdom, making God's intervention contingent on human withdrawal rather than His pursuing nature.
The boundaries book sold millions of copies and your pastor recommended it. All the support groups say the same thing - detach with love, let them fail, don't rescue. It sounds wise and responsible.
The father was watching daily, ran while son still smelled like pigs, didn't require rock bottom or cleanup first, threw a party before behavior change. Total restoration happened in minutes, not after a recovery process.
I REFUSE the lie that my love blocks God's work. IT IS WRITTEN that the Father ran while the son was still far off, kissed him while he still smelled like pigs, restored him BEFORE he proved himself. God doesn't need me to withdraw for Him to move - He's the Father who never detaches, never turns His back, never waits for bottom. IT IS WRITTEN in Hebrews 13:5 He will NEVER leave or forsake - if God doesn't detach, why should I pretend coldness is holiness? I declare I can love her AND trust God simultaneously, give AND watch Him move, stay engaged AND see breakthrough NOW.
The Father is showing you a picture of His own heart - He's not waiting for rock bottom either, He's running toward your child right now while they're still in the mess. Your compassion is His compassion being expressed through you, not an obstacle to overcome.