"If I really had spiritual authority, the enemy wouldn't keep attacking me like this."
How it sounds in your head: You see other Christians who seem to have victory and peace. They don't seem to deal with the constant intrusive thoughts, the fear attacks, the spiritual oppression you face. If you really walked in authority, wouldn't the enemy leave you alone? The fact that he keeps coming back feels like proof you don't actually have the authority you're claiming.
"Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour."
-- 1 Peter 5:8Source: Enemy twists ongoing spiritual attack into evidence of lack of authority rather than evidence you're a threat to his kingdom.
Authority should result in peace and freedom, right? If the enemy respected your authority, he wouldn't keep bothering you. The continued attacks feel like proof that your declarations and commands aren't actually working, that you're missing something other believers have figured out.
Paul - the apostle who wrote half the New Testament, had undeniable spiritual authority, saw the third heaven - dealt with a messenger of Satan sent to torment him. He asked God three times to remove it. The attack didn't stop, and yet Paul was the same man who shook off a viper, raised the dead, and turned regions upside down with the gospel. Ongoing attack didn't negate his authority - it proved he was a threat to darkness.
I REFUSE the lie that ongoing enemy attacks prove I lack spiritual authority. IT IS WRITTEN that the enemy prowls like a roaring lion, seeking to devour - he doesn't stop attacking because I'm powerful, he attacks BECAUSE I'm powerful and he's trying to make me forget it. His desperation is proof of my position, not proof of my powerlessness. Every attack is evidence I'm a threat to his kingdom. IT IS WRITTEN that I am more than a conqueror through Christ. Not 'I will be once the attacks stop' - I AM, present tense, in the middle of the battle. The blessing of Abraham is mine, the blessing that brought enemy armies against Jehoshaphat specifically because he was blessed and powerful. The BARAK makes me a target and a terror to darkness simultaneously. The enemy's attention proves my authority, not my lack of it.
Your Father sees the attacks you're facing and isn't disappointed that you haven't 'arrived' at some attack-free existence. He's proud of you for standing in the middle of the battle. The enemy's persistence isn't proof you're doing it wrong - it's proof you're doing something RIGHT. You're a threat, daughter. That's why he's trying so hard to convince you you're not.