"God is disappointed in me for the thoughts I have and the feelings I can't control"
How it sounds in your head: Every time I have a bad thought or feel jealous or mad, God shakes His head at me. He sees everything I think and I can tell He's disappointed. I'm not the good Christian girl He wanted me to be.
"As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust."
-- Psalm 103:13-14Source: Religion teaching that God monitors every thought as a test, creating performance anxiety before puberty even hits.
Her thoughts are changing as hormones begin, and she feels shame for emotions she didn't choose. She measures God's pleasure by her ability to control her mind, which feels impossible.
Gideon was hiding in fear, questioning God, calling himself the weakest - and the angel called him 'mighty warrior' while he was still trembling. God saw what Gideon would become, not what he currently felt, and gave him instant identity before any change in behavior.
I REFUSE the lie that God is disappointed in me! IT IS WRITTEN that He has compassion on me because He KNOWS how I'm made - He remembers I'm dust! I am NOT a disappointment; I am His DELIGHT! The same God who called fearful Gideon a 'mighty warrior' calls ME His beloved daughter WHILE I'm still learning, WHILE I'm still growing. IT IS WRITTEN that there is NO condemnation for those in Christ Jesus! I stand in the BARAK blessing of Abraham - protected by COVENANT, not perfection! The Father RAN to the prodigal while he still smelled like pigs, and He RUNS to me with every changing thought and feeling!
The Father sees you exactly as you are - changing body, racing thoughts, confusing feelings - and He's not wringing His hands in disappointment. He's leaning in with the tenderness of a father who MADE your body to change, who DESIGNED emotions as gifts, who is THRILLED to walk with you through every stage.