"God is disappointed I haven't forgiven them yet."
How it sounds in your head: It's been months, maybe years, and I'm still angry. I know I'm supposed to forgive, that Jesus said to forgive seventy times seven. But I can't. I'm stuck. And I can feel God's disappointment every time I remember the hurt. He's waiting for me to let it go so He can bless me again.
"bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do."
-- Colossians 3:13Source: religious legalism that makes forgiveness a work you perform to earn God's blessing rather than a grace you receive that enables you to release others.
She's heard countless sermons on 'you must forgive to be forgiven,' making her feel like her unforgiveness is blocking God's approval. The pain is still real, and she feels guilty for not being 'over it' on someone else's timeline.
Joseph's brothers sold him into slavery out of jealousy, then lied to their father that he was dead. Years later, when they feared Joseph's revenge, he said, 'You meant evil against me; but God meant it for good.' He didn't forgive them to earn God's favor—he forgave FROM experiencing God's faithfulness. God blessed him DURING his pain, not after his forgiveness.
I REFUSE the lie that God's blessing is on hold until I perform perfect forgiveness. IT IS WRITTEN that Christ forgave me FIRST—completely, fully, while I was still a sinner—and from THAT forgiveness I can extend grace to others. I don't forgive TO GET God's approval—I forgive FROM HAVING His approval. IT IS WRITTEN that there is NOW no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus, and my Father is not disappointed in my process. I am Abraham's seed, and the BARAK blessing doesn't wait for my perfect obedience. I receive His patience with me as I heal, and His power to release others in His timing.
The Father doesn't see your struggle to forgive as disappointing slowness. He sees His daughter still hurting, and He's not tapping His foot waiting for you to get over it. Like the prodigal's father, He's running toward you IN your pain, not waiting until you've processed it perfectly to embrace you.